Sexual Issues
Loss of libido or sex driver and pain during sex are some of the sexual issues that may affect relationships. Loss of libido is common more in women than in men. Loss of libido affects approximately 20% of men at one time in their life. However, men do not like talking about loss of libido since it is embarrassing to them. Loss of libido is caused by being in an unhappy relationship. It may also be caused by being over familiar with your sexual partner for a long time. Having a high degree or erotic dissatisfaction may also lead to loss of libido. Loss of libido may also be caused by stress, anxiety, or exhaustion. Drinking excess amounts of alcohol may also lead to loss of libido. This necessitates the intake of alcohol to at most four or five units daily for men and at most three units in women. Ageing also leads to loss of libido since as people get older they lose their interest in sex. Reduction in the amount of sex hormones and age-related health problems are the major factors that lead to loss of libido due to ageing (Wincze & Barlow, 2004).
Pain during sexual intercourse is also one of the sexual issues that affect relationships. It may be caused by a variety of reasons. These include illness, a physical problem, infection, or physiological problem. Painful sex affects both men and women. women may experience pain during intercourse either in the vagina or in the pelvis. Pain in the vagina may be caused by infection, menopause, lack of arousal, or genital irritation, which is usually caused allergy to various products. Pain in the pelvis may be caused by constipation, fibroids, pelvic inflammatory disease (PID) or irritable bowel syndrome (IBS). On the other hand, painful sex among men may be caused infections, having a tight foreskin, inflammation of the prostate gland, or testicular pain and swelling (Wincze & Barlow, 2004).
Loss of libido makes couples have a sexless relationship. Has a negative impact on the quality and level of equality in the relationship it also leads to the decline in trust in couples. Lack of sex leaves the partner that wants sex to have feelings of resentment, frustration, and anger. Loss of libido may also affect mood and reduce the self-esteem of the partners. The partner that needs sex may ultimately seek sexual satisfaction outside the relations due to the involuntary abstinence. Sexual dissatisfaction is one of the major causes of infidelity in relationships. Pain during sex may make the partner that feels pain dislike having sex. This may push the partner that does not feel pain during sex into infidelity. Pain during sex also leads to low self esteem among both men and women (Wincze & Barlow, 2004).
Relationships have five major stages. Any relationship moves through the stages and at different speeds. The relationship may move back and forth from one state to another. The romance stage is the first stage in any relationship. The romance stage strives to satisfy the feeling of love and belonging in the couples. This stage is usually characterized by dreams, fantasies and hopes for the future of the relationship. The romance stage may last between 2 months and 2 years. However, it usually averages 6 months (Harvey, Wenzel, Sprecher, 2004).
The power struggle stage is the second stage in any relationship. During this stage, the couples explore each other upon which they discover differences. This prompts a power struggle. This is the most difficult stage in any relationship. Most relationships are terminated during this stage. This stage strives to satisfy the need for power and some freedom. Power struggle usually starts when couples move in together. It may last several years (Harvey, Wenzel, Sprecher, 2004).
Stability stage is the third stage in a sexual relationship. During this stage, couples learn to cope with each other’s differences. They establish clear boundaries. During this stage, couples strive to satisfy the need for freedom and choice. However, the major danger of this stage is that couples may realize they have different paths in life with their partners. This makes them have a sense of loss and sadness as they may have failed to realize their dreams due to the relationship. Couples in this stage focus more on the present. This is because they have not planned the future. Counseling and divorce are common in this stage (Harvey, Wenzel, Sprecher, 2004).
Commitment stage is the fourth stage in the lifecycle of a sexual relationship. Couples should contemplate on getting married at this stage. However, most couples get married at the romance stage. In this stage, couples make clear choices on themselves and their partners while considering their similarities and differences. This stage strives to fulfill a balance of love, power, freedom, and fun. At this stage, couples start feeling comfortable with each other.
The co-creation stage is the last stage in a sexual life cycle. During this stage, couples face the world as a team. Therefore, they may bear children or form joint ventures. The role of this stage is to handle issues they may face as a team. Over involvement with the outside world is the major danger at this stage. This is due to the fact that it leads to the neglect of the relationship (Harvey, Wenzel, Sprecher, 2004).
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